Breed : The Fussy best friend who has turned nocturnal
- Never! Wake-up before midday- or suffer the consequences of their wrath ( if the matter is of great importance make sure you have a cup of tea/ hot beverage to lure them out.)
- Feed once a day making sure it doesn't contain any of the following - brocilli, cabbage, carrots , bean sprouts, or any other root vegetable that is not a pepper or mushroom.
- Make sure that snacks are available at all times
- Never leave anything to get mouldy or they will have a fit and throw it at you (not nice to clean)
- Always be there for them if they have an issue, because they will be there for you too
- Listen intently when they are talking and make mental notes in order to bring up in conversation at a later date.
- Offer advice on outfits for nights out ( the to wear heels or not to wear heels can be a tough one so watch out for that )
- Bar block, Cock block etc. When they are too drunk to function.
- Do not let them decide to cook/shower when drunk theses are extreme Hazards
- If they get emotional when drunk try and be patient, they will repeat everything you already know
- Most importantly tell them that you love them every day pffft ... Frape at every opportunity or consider it a fail
- All these things should ensure the happiness of your new flatmate.
This started as a little joke between my flat mate and I and I figured I would attempt to take it further.
Much Love x
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